Engineering Your Relationship with Mindful Habits


If the thrill of new love naturally inspires you to be attentive to your partner and more willing to develop positive habits, one must wonder if mindfully practicing these same positive behaviors now can inspire you to feel the exciting connection of new love again.

 Can you reverse engineer your choices and behaviors to re-create the closeness, passion, and thrill of your first months together?

Let us ask this a different way: If your partner treated you with the same love, desire, respect, attention, and tenderness he or she showed you in the beginning.

If your partner practiced the same self-care and personal initiative, and if you showed these things back to your partner, would your relationship improve?

Of course, it would! How could it not if you both were communicating easily, reigniting your chemistry, enjoying conflict-free time together, and seeing one another in the best light possible? But is this time-travel scenario realistic? Is it even possible? You may not be able to recapture the same exhilarating magic you experienced back in the day, but you can reignite your feelings, deepen your intimacy, and overcome your challenges more easily by choosing to have an intentional relationship based on the foundation you have built as a couple.

 Your years together have given you gifts that are immensely valuable and satisfying mutual comfort, devotion, security, familiarity, commitment, attachment, and shared memories.

Now, imagine having this foundation of mature love, coupled with some of the feelings you experienced early in your relationship.

Imagine relearning ways to please, inspire, and love one another that reenergize your connection and bring you closer than you ever thought possible.

Use Habits to Revive Your Love : By developing or strengthening some of the relationship habits that came so naturally years ago, you can reignite old feelings and build a healthier, happier, sexier, and more mindful relationship with your partner. Even if things have grown difficult between you, and there are challenging issues to deal with, just adopting a few new positive behaviors or dropping some negative habits can change the entire tenor of your relationship. Because you are now paying attention with intention to your partner and the quality of your connection, you will see a positive shift in the way you interact with one another.

These habits will help you be more present with one another, communicate better, avoid divisive arguments, and understand and respond to one another’s needs in a more loving, empathic, and conscious way.

Make a mutual decision that you want a mindful relationship in which you work as a team to nourish and protect your love. When one partner is eager and willing to work on the relationship and the other partner is resistant, it makes it much more challenging to build a close and healthy connection. The resistant partner’s lack of participation can impact the motivation and enthusiasm of the willing partner. Even so, it is still well worth developing these relationship habits on your own, even if your partner doesn’t participate. Your more attentive, thoughtful behaviors and words will serve as a model for the way you want your partner to respond and can motivate him or her to join you in this valuable work.


Preview photo credit: pixbay

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